A lot of my clients are neurodivergent — many of them are autistic and/or have ADHD.

One issue that comes up time and again is 'consistency'. Specifically, the feeling of shame for not being 'consistent'.

This breaks my heart because it is so common — and it's such a harmful myth.

The Narrow Definition of Consistency That Doesn't Serve Us

We've been taught that consistency means a very specific and narrow set of outcomes.

Consistency, particularly in the business world, looks like: content calendars, monthly or yearly launches, sending out an email every week on a Tuesday...

And if we don't meet that standard or achieve that sort of output, it can feel like we have definitively failed.

The thing is, when we feel rubbish about ourselves (because we're failures in this scenario!), it's much harder to feel motivated. It becomes nearly impossible to feel creative, curious, experimental, relaxed or comfortable.

In short, the shame of not being consistent makes us:

Feel like, "Well, what's the point in trying?"
And definitely doesn't encourage us to make our best work.

I get it. The shame we feel comes from the judgement of our society, our culture, and the people we've met who have insisted that consistency looks like X, Y and Z.

In these circumstances, it takes time, intention, and effort to relearn and reshape our definition of consistency.

But it can be done.

Finding a Better Model: Nature's Consistency

One of the models I love to look to is that of nature.

Nature has so many examples of consistency that don't fit into a weekly or monthly content calendar.

For example, trees and plants grow very rapidly at certain times of the year and appear to be 'barely doing anything' at other times.

And it's not the same from year to year. Plants and animals adapt and respond to changing temperature patterns (as we see with climate change). Their growth is affected by their environment (which, again, changes from year to year).

We accept that this variation and adaptability is part of nature. It doesn't mean we completely ignore a plant's or a species' tendencies and living patterns — instead, we wonder about the environment it's in and what might be affecting its growth and well-being.

A Morally Neutral Approach to Productivity

This is the type of model I come back to again and again — because it's morally neutral. There's no shame involved in a plant's growth. It doesn't mean we can't influence or affect change. But we might want to approach it by asking: "What can I do to make a change that might be beneficial?"

What if we took this sort of approach when looking at our own productive or creative tendencies?

What if instead of trying to follow a factory model of consistency, we were more open to other models and patterns being the norm?

Mapping Your Natural Rhythms and Patterns

Have you ever noticed or mapped out your energy or mood patterns?

Have you observed if there are patterns in your energy levels? These may be affected by time of the month, the year, or the season.

Does your energy tend to get depleted if you're doing a lot of things all at once? Or if you've had to do a lot of socialising (like mine does)?

Are you someone who works well in intensive bursts followed by periods of relative lower energy? Do certain environments help or hinder your thought processes and creativity?

Working With Your Natural Tendencies, Not Against Them

When we have awareness of these cycles and can trust them (and our own bodies and experience), we can adapt our working and lifestyle according to our natural tendencies — and it is here that I believe we uniquely thrive as human beings.

For me personally, I'm very introverted and lose energy quickly in social situations. I know I couldn't build a business based on extensive in-person networking. It would be genuinely unsustainable for me, and if I tried to force myself to attend event after event, I would burn out rapidly. I'd be absolutely miserable, and the experience would be extremely unpleasant for everyone around me.

I know this about myself — not from mere fear or lack of self-belief, but from my observed and lived experience. I don't shame myself for not being more extroverted. I don't criticise myself because I'm not actively consistent with in-person networking.

Instead, I choose methods and approaches that are far better suited to my preferences and capacities.

Embracing Your Unique Consistency

I invite you to learn and trust the methods and approaches that align beautifully with your unique preferences and capacities.

Consistency isn't simply about doing the same thing in the same way at the same time from here until eternity.

I know that's often what our brain tells us it is!

But look beyond the factory or productivity model. Look at what's been happening for thousands and millions of years. You are part of nature. You are nature. You have a whole constellation of patterns and consistencies within you.

This different form of consistency is no less real.

Remind yourself of this truth the next time someone tells you that you need to be 'more consistent'. 💛

Finding Support for Your Natural Rhythms

Learning to work with your natural rhythms rather than against them—when we've been told to suppress them—is a process and a half!

It takes time, self-compassion, self-trust, and often support.

This is exactly the kind of work I do with my creative clients (who are often neurodivergent but not always). Together, we map natural patterns and design sustainable practices that acknowledge those patterns, while addressing the self-doubt that can emerge when we're feeling low or in a wobbly space.

If you'd like support in finding and developing your unique rhythm and building a creative practice or business that works with your brain and body rather than against it, I'd love to see if we're a good fit. You can find out more about my coaching services here.

"Why Can't I Be Consistent?" Redefining Consistency for (Neurodivergent) Creatives